I hate everything (so you dont have to)
My First post! Fashion People, Carolina Herrera, Todd Michael Schultz, being ignored and drinking water as bathroom break ignore tactics.
I am sitting in aisle seat 28B, the last row on the a plane back from Dallas, Tx (and Los Angeles before that) as two brands I consult for had events there last week. Both brands are founded by women, they don’t make junk and I am proud to be connected to both of them.
I am listening to Lauren Sherman’s PUCK podcast, “fashion people” (Becky Malinsky episode. With one working airpod, the left one (Alexandra did you mention your right AirPod wasn’t working? If yes, I have it)***
***pause to write down Becky’s three revenue streams from her substack, this feels important…— affiliate, subscription, brand partnerships***
I am wearing a khaki-ish pant from the row that I bought on Mr Porter ten days ago. Resting on top those is the Bret Easton Ellis’s book, The Shard. On top of The Shard are my hands, and then my phone.
Note on The Shard: Rich from pot psychology, my favorite podcast recommended it which is usually enough - I forgot about this book shortly after it was published,
but what pushed me over the edge and made me put down my re-read of Alan Hollinghurst’s “The Line of Beauty” is when I remembered BEE’s boyfriend TODD ran for president and is a real mess in that way only people in West Hollywood can be. He also sues anyone who breathes near him, lol and so on brand #wehogays.
It’s 2:22PM and I’d rather be reading my book (I’d almost always rather be reading my book) but I am writing while listening to Lauren, who read but didn’t respond to my dm inviting her to the a pop up in Los Angeles, talk to Becky who i do not know outside of Lauren’s line sheet. Lauren regularly states that her listeners can text, call or dm her so I did. I didn’t recognize that she doesn’t say she will actually respond to communication and when I realized this, I decided to no longer take her ignoring me personally / my feelings are no longer hurt and I might even dare to write her again!
(The first time I thought about writing her was to confirm that Ashley Olsen was indeed wearing Maison Bonnet sunglasses, the same place I get my glasses both optical and otherwise but I thought that was stupid and didn’t bother.
)
Becky writes a successful substack recommending 5 items everyone should have that I have never read. I think - I’m multitasking as I said (#adhd) Lauren just said she wants an Hermes bag and Becky thinks that’s quite lame - “let’s talk about it…” and it makes me like Becky if what I think I heard is true.
*pause to listen to what Becky thinks we should buy - cotton drawstring pants from the row - Lauren is returning the same tshirt from The row I am keeping (they don’t explicitly say which tshirt it is but I know the one).
Yes, Lauren, you can’t wear it under a blazer but you can wear it without one and look better than most who are wearing tshirt/blazer so…
For a moment I consider naming whatever these notes will become “5 things no one needs” but I have decided on “i hate everything (so you don’t have to)”. The day one goal of this letter is twofold: to practice writing shorter sentences and consistently write in hopes of discovering why its so much easier to hate something than appreciate it.
After the brand shopping event/ lunch I was doing at Mirador (housed on the top floor of forty five ten, a good store I used to describe as “NET-A-PORTER” as a store) in Dallas, I found myself at the bar of the rosewood mansion drinking water with the co-host (Alexandra, my bestie) of the events mom, and a woman I don’t know who attended the lunch. She didn’t buy anything at the shopping event (fine) but spent the hour at the bar talking about all the stuff she buys (not fine). This behavior tells you everything you need to know about this person. I recite Karl Lagerfeld’s gospel a few times “If you’re Cheap, nothing helps” to myself while trying not to use the sweet and spicy pecans as a caloric balm for my burning ears. I drink as much water as possible so I can believably go to the bathroom several times, if needed, for respite.
Alexandra’s mom asks upon me returning from my (first trip) to the bathroom if I like Carolina Herrera and I say plainly reply, “no”.
I respond to questions honestly but respectfully (as in, “no” and not “omg gross I HATE) and never expect / need someone to agree with me and if someone tells me they love the thing I don’t, it doesn’t make me like them less (#nojudgements , truly!). Also, this is just stuff… If someone asked me if I liked their grandma, I would say yes even if I didn’t.
Rant / Insight: I enjoy having friends who disagree with me, I don’t need my friends to wear the same brands I do (and they don’t), I appreciate and welcome a good debate and am not afraid to admit when I am wrong or if someone’s point of view has shifted mine. My willingness to respect and acknowledge others opinions that differ from mine and my curiosity into why people feel the way they do is my second favorite thing about me. My first favorite thing about me is that I am gay. As these ideals live on the surface of my consciousness, they make themselves known.
At the table during my bathroom break, the woman began discussing (unbeknownst to me) how much she liked Carolina Herrera and my not liking it the way she did really threw this person for a loop and her insecurity began to ooze through her zebra print poly blend midi dress. “Well, I only like their handbags - I have several (Carolina Herrera has handbags?! Who knew) and their men’s dress shirts for my husband.
(Ironically, 24 hours later I would find myself in this same bar with Alexandra and my pal Blakely discussing what he perfectly describes as “contrast cuff gays” - if you ever meet one, run. He also correctly mused that famous people stay the same person they were the age they become famous which mirrors something I have always believed: That most gay men dress how they did at the age they got hit on the most in gay bars. To quote Donald Trump, “not good!”
Now, I know that Carolina Herrera does not sell men’s dress shirts - or menswear at all….(I doubt those men’s looks from last years cruise collection during a monsoon in rio — I have a true disdain for runway collections that are not produced —I blame customers and 25 year old fashion buyers, not brands here, for the record) and they are actually from the label “CH”, a cheaper label that is popular outside of America and likely lost any actual connection to Carolina Herrera but this person thinks they are the same thing which, again , tells you everything you need to know about this person.
*pause to remember the actual worst thing about Covid- stopping the production of the Prada bowling bags they showed on the men’s runway for spring summer 2020 that I realllyyyyyywanted and still want*
ANYWAYS , because I generally answer questions honestly and I get asked questions about stuff pretty often I have found myself to have a bit of a reputation. This reputation is for “hating everything”. As the world gets worse, my reputation for said dislike has become more universal and is hared by my friends, my husband, most people, blah blah blah. So, I have decided to to write about it-ish.
Rant/ Insight: I don’t hate everything but admittedly, I like what I like and I don’t like much. I usually only say “I LOVE” when referring to something other than a person In a working capacity as it gets the point across but I generally find it weird that people attach love to objects more often than humans and so I try to keep that in check for myself. I’m very comfortable obsessing over brands (pre-raf Prada, raf’s Calvin, rafs jil minus that garbage collection inspired by tomb raider as a few examples ) and I hope that never changes
*Pause, the flight attendant who has hit me at least three times - twice with her ass and once with her elbow - and not once apologized - just spilled water all over previously mentioned ish-khakis, need a napkin*
Ultimately I want to talk about stuff I like here, rather than about what i “hate” and I I will eventually but it’s now 3:22pm, there’s only 56 minutes left in my flight and I want to get to The Shards. On this sunny summer Sunday in the sky, Hate wins!
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